Every Man For Himself
by cooliochick5
Summary: When something goes wrong with Noodle in Kong Studio, who the boys gonna call? Defiantly not the Ghost Busters. 2D's mother to the rescue!
1. Sunk

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing**_

It was a regular day in Kong, well, as regular as it was going to get. Anyway, 2D was just getting over a migraine, Murdoc was getting over a hangover, and Russel was getting over lunch.

And that's when they heard it.

A small cry coming from the living room.

All three men went to investigate, and what they stumbled upon was pretty unnerving.

There was ten-year-old Noodle, sitting on the couch, crying so hard, her face was red.

"Wot's wrong wit 'er?" Murdoc asked. the other two men shrugged, then slowly, all three got the same idea.

"You don' thin' she start'd her...ya know, yet?" 2D asked, glancing over at the girl.

"SHUDDUP, DULLARD, THA'S RIDICULOUS!." Murdoc yelled, fearing that for once in his life, 2D would be right.

"Maybe we should call someone, you know, like a woman, probably someone older than us, who has more experience..." Russel trailed off, "Do we know anyone like that?"

"FACEACHE DOES!" Murdoc exclaimed.

"I do?" 2D asked, just as Noodle's crying turned into sobs. That scared the men enough to actually hide in a broom closet.

"Anyway, I do?" 2D asked, wedge between the bassist and drummer in the tiny broom closet.

"Your mother, dullard!" Murdoc would have slapped him if he had room to do so.

"Oh right...I CAN'T CALL MY MUM AND ASK HER 'BOUT A GIRL PROBLEM!" 2D argued.

"Why the fuck not?!" Murdoc asked.

"It's...It's too awkward." 2D admitted

"Fine, then, Russel, you call."

"No way, man!"

"Well, i ain't doing it, Facheache's mum hates me."

"FINE! I'll call." 2D groaned, grabbing his cell phone out of his pocket.

the second he typed in the number, his mother picked up.

"Stuart! How are you, how is everything, why don't you call more often." Rachel began rambling.

"H-hi, mum, listen, we have a problem over here."

"Problem? What kind of problem?"

"Well...you remember Noodle right?"

"yes, why, is she alright?"

"Well, we aren't sure exactly, we found her in front of the TV, crying."

"Was she watching a movie?"

"Yes."

"Which one?"

"Titanic, I think."

"Ooooh, just turn it off, and tell her it's okay, she'll be fine."

"You mean the movie was making her cry?"

"Probably."

"...thanks mum!" 2D exclaimed. hanging up the phone.

The three men ran from the closet to the living room. Murdoc grabbed the remote, while 2D pulled Noodle into a hug, and Russel grabbed the DVD out of the player.

Noodle looked at the men curiously.

"Well...that wasn't so hard." Russel sighed.

"Hey!" Noodle squeaked, "I...watch that!"


	2. Missing Unmentionables

Noodle was looking around the laundry room. At one point, she began to desperately throw clothes around to try to find what she was looking for. She even ran to her own room and began tearing it up trying to find the missing item.

It wasn't until she started crying did the boys seem to notice the girl's strange behaviour.

"Noods? Wuh's wrong?" 2D asked, being a little cautious.

The little ten-year old looked up at him.

"I...It...go...gone!" She cried, doing her best to word what was wrong.

"Gone, what's gone?" 2D asked.

"Can...no...find!" Noodle tried to explain.

"Can't find what, baby girl?" Russel now spoke, putting a hand on the japanese child.

"...Hm..." Noodle tried to think of the word, when suddenly it dawned on her, "PANTIES!"

Both Russel and 2D froze, and started turning many shades of red.

"P-p-panties?" 2D said slowly, to make sure he had just heard her right.

"Hai!" Noodle began to cry again.

"What do you mean, baby?" Russel asked.

"They...go...gone!" She sobbed.

"Gone? You don't think Murdoc stole them, do ya?" 2D asked, but Noodle shook her head.

"I...out." She tried to explain yet again.

"I'm so confused." Russel admitted.

"Maybe we should just buy her more." 2D suggested. Not a bad idea...or so they thought.

**At the store:**

Noodle browsed the wall of panties and socks. She couldn't decide on what to get. Why did she even have to buy panties anyway? Couldn't she just go commando all day (what even that means, all she knew was apparently Murdoc did that everyday, and it made Russel mad because he would find his underwear everywhere). Finally giving up, the axe princess ran to find 2D, who was staring at a rack of zombie movies.

"Toochi, help!" She grabbed the older man's hand.

"Noods? What's up?" He asked.

"Toochi, help...Noodle." She replied, before dragging 2D to the girls' department.

"You...want me...to help you...pick a pair of...Oh my." The frontman finally caught on.

"Toochi, help!" Noodle pointed to the wall of panties.

2D's face went completely white.

"Um...why not ask Russel?" He asked.

Noodle looked over to see the man looking at kitchen appliances.

"Russel-san, help!" Noodle dragged the man to the girls' department as well. The first thing he noticed was 2D, looking like he was going to fall over.

"What's wrong, man?" He asked, 2D nodded toward the wall. Now, both men were dumbfounded.

And that was how they both wound up crammed in a mens' changing room stall.

"What do we do!?" 2D whispered quickly.

"I don't know man!" Russel tried not to scream.

"Okay, okay, maybe...umm..."

"Wait, why don't we just call your mom!?"

"Great idea!" 2D whipped out his phone and dialed his mom's number quickly.

"What is your mom's number anyway?" Russel asked.

"543-2176." 2D mumbled as he waited for his mom to answer.

"Alright, I'm saving that to my speed dial." Russel said, but 2D hushed him.

"Mom? Hey, yeah everything is fine, ummm, listen, we're at the department store now, could you meet us there, what? No, I didn't get stuck in the revolving door again! Once, ma, it only happened once. It was Logan's fault. So you'll meet us? Great. Bye." 2D hung up.

"Um...You got stuck in a revolving door?" Russel tried not to laugh.

"SHUT UP!"

**20 minutes later:**

"So what's all the trouble?" Rachel asked when she finally got there.

"Tell me mum what's wrong, Noods." 2D put his hand on the girl's shoulder.

"Panties..go-g...gone." Noodle said.

"So you need to buy more panties, and these blokes can't man up and be mature?" Rachel asked.

"Hai!"

"Figures, well come on, Noodle, let's go find you some garments."

The second the two where out of sight, Russel and 2D found it completely appropriate to run to the video game aisle and try to regain their dignity.

_**A/N: So I had to buy some nylons, and since my mom was working, I had to go by myself. So I'm trying to figure this out and I think "Man, mom would now how to do this, maybe I should call her, nope, I'm 15, I can do this...WHAT THE HELL AM I DOING!?" and so I came up with this idea where since Noodle doesn't have a mother, shopping might be craziness, so this kind of thing will be present a lot in this XD THANKS FOR READING!**_


	3. Behind Closed Doors

It was a normal day, or at least it should have been, anyway. But there was a reason all three men were pressed against the youngest band member's bedroom door.

"It can't be!" 2D whispered.

"She's too young!" Russel tried to reason.

"Even I think she's too young!" Murdoc exclaimed. Both men stared at him.

"Whatever, okay, maybe she's just...I don't know, jumping on the bed?"

"Noods knows better." Russel shot.

"You never know!"

"Okay, let's just-" 2D was cut off by a sudden scream of what sounded like pleasure.

"NOODLE!" The three screamed, throwing open the door.

There was Noodle, jumping happily on her bed, giggling and screaming when she got too high. She stopped instantly when she saw her boys.

"Wuh wong?" She asked.

"Nothing, babygirl, we thought you-um, never mind." Russel tried backing away.

"Russel-san, tell." She pleaded.

"Um, nothing."

"Russel." Her eyes began to well up with tears, she hated when the boys kept things from her.

And that was how Murdoc, Russel, and 2D wound up crammed in the ventilation system of Kong Studio

"Maybe if we ignore her, she'll forget about it." Murdoc suggested.

"Nah, babygirl doesn't forget these types of things." Russel reminded him.

"Guys, let's just call me mum, she could explain to her, so we don't have to." 2D reminded them.

"Great idea!"

With a push of a button, and a few awkward seconds of explanation later, the boys waited patiently for Rachel to arrive.

"So what do I need to explain? 'Noodle was jumping on her bed, and yeah' isn't a very good explanation." the woman said when she arrived.

All men blushed hard, when finally Russel spoke.

"Mrs. Pot, have you ever jumped on a bed before?"

"Yes, so?"

"What does it sound like."

"Good God, you men are immature, where is she?" Rachel asked. As if on cue, Noodle entered the room.

"Russel tell now?" She asked.

"Honey, the boys thought you were 'jumping on the bed' and you know that's not allowed, right?" Rachel knelt next to the girl.

"I know, but fun!" She exclaimed.

"I know, dear, but they don't want you to get hurt."

"Oh, so I no trouble?" Noodle asked.

"No, hun, not at all."

"Hai!" the tiny girl exclaimed, then ran to give each man a hug.

"Why didn't we think of telling her that!?" 2D exclaimed.

"'Cause men are idiots." Rachel snapped before leaving the house.

Well, that was easy.


	4. Shoe Emergancy

"Russell-san!" Noodle called from her bedroom.

"Wha's up, babygirl?" He called back.

"Come, come!" She replied. Russell sighed and dragged himself off of the couch.

"Wha's wrong, Noods?" The man said as he stepped into the ten-year-old's room.

"Russell-san, hole, see." The child proceeded to point down. Russell went slack-jawed.

"Um, Noodle, what are you pointing at?" He almost began to sweat when the girl lifted her tiny foot.

"Hole, shoe, see?" She said pointing at her shoe, and wiggling her visible toe. Sure enough, there was a hole in her shoe, a pretty sizable one actually.

"Oh, you need new shoes, great...'D, GET YOU ASS IN HE'E!" Russell hollered to his partner-in-crime.

2D stumbled into the room, looking extremely tired.

"Wha? I jus' woke up from a nap." He whined.

"Noods needs new shoes." Russell answered.

"So?"

"So? Well, you're the only one of us whose been around girls long enough to know what they're like."

"Tha' makes nuh damn sense." 2D protested.

"Neitha' does yo' face."

"Well, ya go' meh there, but it doe'n't matta', buyin' her shoes can't be tha' hard, righ'?" The singer asked.

"Well, that's just it, I dunno, man."

"Shoul' we call me mum?" 2D finally asked something that made sense.

"Yes...Yes we should."

**_later that day:_**

Noodle ran around the mall, happily sporting her brand new shoes.

"You men are so thick, ya know!" Rachel snapped, "Couldn't even buy a girl a damn pair o' shoes! Raisin' a girl ain't that hard!"

Russell and 2D just sighed heavily. They had no idea what they were doing.

_**A/N: Russell and 2D, taking the easy way out since 1998 XD. Silly boys. THANKS FOR READING!**_


	5. Va-Va-Voom

There comes a time in a woman's life when she begins to change, and Noodle was no exception.

She was getting taller now, and Russell said it might be time for her to get a 'b-r-a' soon.

"B-r-a?" Noodle thought. What could that be?

Maybe it was in one of Murdoc's magazines or something she thought as she skipped to the Winnebago. The only pictures she saw in the magazines were of girls with what looked to be balloons stuffed up their revealing-as-heck tops.

"Hmm..." Noodle thought, "Maybe those are b-r-a..."

**_Back in the kitchen of Kong studio:_**

"Can't we just hold off on getting her a bra?" 2D asked, really not wanting to have to face the girl's department any time soon.

"Eh, you're right, we're just over- Oh dear Lord." Russell dropped his coffee mug as Noodle pranced into the room.

"Umm...Noodle?" 2D asked when he saw the girl.

"Hai?" She asked, making both men flinch.

"Oy, Faceache, you know where my, SWEET SATAN AND ALL THAT IS WORTH MY TIME!" Murdoc exclaimed when he saw the young girl.

And so, it was off to the department store.

* * *

The boys looked extremely out of place in the bra aisle.

"What kind of code is this?" 2D asked, picking up a bra that was labled 34B.

"I dunno man, its sizes I guess." Russell said, never looking away from the socks hanging on the wall.

"The only sizes I know are 'eh', 'oh', and 'DAMN!'" Murdoc joked.

"This?" Noodle asked, returning with a 38DD.

'This' was too much for our heros, who politely excused themselves, then ran for the nearest place to hide.

That place came in the form of a cabinet in the kitchen department.

"What do we do!?" Murdoc whispered as loud as he could.

2D, who was now wedged between Murdoc and the door, piped up.

"We could just...I don't know!"

Both singer and bassist looked to the drummer, who was dialing something into his phone.

"Who are you calling? We're in a bit of a crisis here!" Murdoc shot.

"Shut it," Russell argued, "I'm calling 'D's mom!"

* * *

The boys all sat outside of the mall, waiting patiently for Noodle and Rachel to come out.

Once they did, Noodle held out her new training bra.

"See! B-r-a." She smiled brightly.

"That tiny thing?" Russell asked

"You are aware she was bra-stuffing." Rachel pointed out.

"..."

"..."

"..."

"..."

"..."

"I-I'm gonna need a drink." Murdoc groaned, rubbing his temple.

"I'll join you." 2D stood up.

"Yeah, i could go for a bloody mary right now..." Russell followed the other men, leaving Rachel and Noodle.

"Men... weird..hai?" Noodle asked.

"Yes...They are weird."


	6. Except Cologne, 'Cause it's poison

There were a few things Noodle managed to learn simply by watching the boys in action. She learned that swearing, and drinking too much, and passing out on the kitchen table was unacceptable. She learned that staying up past her bed time was not allowed too. She learned english, and manners, and not to bug 2D when he had a migraine. Speaking of 2D, she learned something very interesting from him.

Whenever the girl hugged the singer right after he showered, he usually smelled like butterscotch. Actually, that's how he normally smelled. The only time he didn't was when he'd spray himself with something. Noodle watched carefully as this action took place.

It was right before the concert, and the Japanese girl was already ready to go. She skipped down the hallways, calling to all the band members, "We go now!"

She sprinted to Russel's room, and flung the door open "RUSSEL-SAN! LET'S GO!" She giggled as the man fumbled around, trying to get his shoe on. She slammed the door, and ran to the lift, pressing the button for the basement. She ran to the Winnebago, and pounded on the door.

" MURDOC!" She cheered happily, making sure to hold out each sylibol.

"WHAT!?" The bassist yelled back, flinging open the door of the love-shack-on-wheels.

"We go now?"

"Not yet" Murdoc growled before slamming the door shut again. Noodle shrugged, then skipped happily to 2D's room.

Another thing she learned, always knock quietly before entering 2D's room. If he's taking a nap, or well, doing anything really, knocking too loudly will cause the poor boy to either freak out, get a migraine, forget what he was originally doing, well, you get the picture.

"Toochi?" Noodle peeked her head into the door. There was a banging sound, causing her to open the door completely.

"Almost ready." 2D sat on his heels and rubbed the back of his head. Noodle figured he was probably looking for something under his bed.

"Toochi hurt?" The child asked, climbing onto the singer's bed.

"I'm fine, just can't find my- oh there it is!" The blue-haired man hopped to his feet and walked to his nightstand. He picked up a can and started spraying himself with it.

Noodle watched in pure awe. The room went from smelling like cigarettes and butterscotch, to something cool and musky.

"What that?" The girl pointed to the can.

"Body spray."

"What?"

"Cologne."

"Colon?"

2D opened his mouth to say something, but was cut off by Russel.

"TIME TO GO YOU GUYS!" Russel called. 2D and Noodle raced each other to the steps, and nothing more was said about it until after the concert. Noodle was feeling sleepy and 2D offered to carry her. The second Noodle was in his arms, she nuzzled her head against his neck. He still smelled like musk and ice.

"What colon?" Noodle asked sleepily.

"Cologne?"

"Hai!"

"Well, it just makes you smell good, girls have perfume for that, though."

"Perfume?"

"I'll buy you some, you can figure it out from there." 2D rubbed her back. Noodle yawned, rested her head on her best friend's shoulder again, and finally fell asleep.

**_The next day:_**

2D had kept his promise. He had gone out to the mall and returned with some perfume for Noodle.

"Here ya go." He handed her a purple bottle with 'Love Spell' written on it.

Noodle bounced around her room excitedly, hugging the bottle close to her. 2D laughed, patted the child's head, then left the room.

Two seconds, that's all it took! A horrible smell filled the halls of Kong studio.

"Sweet Satan! What the hell is that!?" Murdoc staggered into the kitchen, covering his nose.

"Oh God, it smells like my grandmother." Russel was trying to open a window. 2D immediately leaned out the window the second Russel had it open, he was gagging and his eyes were watering.

Noodle skipped happily into the room. The sight before her was pretty curious, so she walked up to 2D and tugged on his shirt. 2D turned his head and hit it against the window pane before climbing back into the house.

"Toochi, what go on?" Noodle asked. 2D's eyes widened when he finally figure it out. Noodle was what smelled horrible!

"Noodle, did you put on that perfume I gave you?"

"Hai." Noodle smiled happily, holding up the already half empty bottle.

2D looked up just in time to see Russel and Murdoc motioning for him to join them. The boy nodded, then ran like hell.

* * *

Now, safely hidden in Murdoc's Winnebago, which was now parked in a near-by church parking lot, the boys paced the floor.

"'ow do we tell 'er tha' 'er perfume smells loike crap?" 2D thought out loud.

"We jus' come righ' out and tell 'er." Murdoc stated.

"That's a horrible idea! Little girls are sensitive!" Russel exclaimed, "We should just tell her gently."

"..."

"..."

"..."

"HOW THE HELL DO WE DO THAT!?" Murdoc exploded.

"SHH!" 2D and Russel exclaimed, both crowded around 2D's phone.

"Right! Fach-ache's mum!" Murdoc joined the boys as they waited desperately for Rachel to pick up.

"What is it this time boys?"

"HELP!"

**_20 Minutes later:_**

The three men occupied themselves with opening every window in Kong Studio while Rachel explained to Noodle how to put perfume on.

"Just a few sprays on your arms will do it." Rachel demonstrated with her own bottle on perfume, Noodle nodding as she wanted. Rachel paused, now that the cloud of perfume was lifted, the true aroma of the scent was revealed. It actually didn't smell too bad, it was like berries and ice or something.

"Noodle, did you pick out this scent?" Rachel asked.

"Nuh huh, Toochi did." Noodle explained.

All eyes landed on 2D. Everyone watched as his manhood, pride, and ability to show his face in public flew right out the open windows of Kong Studio.

A/N: I wrote this on the way to one of my classes. This chick in front of me sprayed perfume, and as I fell to the ground, my eyes and nose burning (okay, maybe it wasn't that bad) I came up with this idea. That and my sisters, and cousin spray perfume without caution, so yeah XD Oh and The class I was typing this in, some girl put perfume on. Exact same scent 2D got for Noodle. Crazy, right XD


	7. The Truth is in the Hair

Noodle stared at her reflection in her bedroom mirror. She was in an intense staring contest with herself it seemed. Neither girl, nor reflection dared blink as the girl reached for a lock of the reflection's dark hair. She twisted it around in her fingers for a while, then let it fall. She had finally made up her mind. Noodle jumped off her dresser and ran to the kitchen to find some scissors.

When she returned to her room, she crudely brushed all the hairs on her head, then picked up a single lock. She aligned it with the scissors and...

_Snip, snip, snip._

Noodle looked back at her face in the mirror, now sporting a new hairstyle. Her once shoulder-length hair was now choppy, and somewhere around the base of her neck. She now sported some very uneven bangs as well. She stared for a long while, before smiling.

"I do good!" She clapped her hands excitedly, before hopping off her dresser again and running off to find her boys.

* * *

Like always, Russel was in the living room, watching some crazy show (Project Runway), and eating a few chips. 2D had finally emerged from his room, and was passed out on the floor in front of the TV. Murdoc had come up stairs for just a second to grab a beer.

"Murdoc-san!" Noodle skipped into the room.

"Wha' do ya- SWEET SATAN, CHILD!" Murdoc jumped, throwing his already open beer can in the air.

"I do good!" Noodle threw her arms up, just like Murdoc had done.

Murdoc held back a smirk, "Um...Let's see wha' Lards and Faceache think..."

"Hey, we jus' heard a girl screamin', is everythin'-Oh-" Russel's face went blank.

"My..." 2D looked very carefully at the girl.

"I do good?" Noodle looked curiously at them.

* * *

Now safely hiding in a ball pit at a local restaurant, 2D fumbled around for his phone.

"So, Mudz, what's it like to have balls in your face?" Russel tried making light of the situation.

"Go fuck yourself."

"WHO JUST SWORE!" Was the first words to erupt from 2D's phone.

"Murdoc, now listen-"

"GO TELL MURDOC TA WASH 'IS MOUTH OUT THIS INSTANT!"

"Ya 'eard her, Mudz."

"Fu-"

"DON' SAY IT!" Rachel argued.

"Fine."

"Okay, so anyways, Mom, we 'ave a problem."

"Wha' is it this time?"

"Noodle cut her 'air...a lot, and it doesn' exa'tly look...yeah..." 2D trailed off.

"Well, ta'e her ta the salon."

2D's face went completely blank of all emotions, "Mother...If you still want a son by the end of the day, you won't make me go in there."

"You 'ave ta, 'm at dinner with your father."

"Bu-"

"Bye, love you, sweety." Rachel quickly hung up the phone.

"Men...ou' mission, shoul' we choose ta accep' it," 2D looked grim, "Operation: Ta'e Noodle ta the 'air salon."

* * *

It was a scary event, really. They told Noodle they were going somewhere, and she just got into geep, no questions asked. The boy proceeded to fight over who was going to drive, which ended with 2D with the keys. No one said a word as they drove to one of the most girly places in town: Heidi's Hair Care.

Noodle smiled brightly when 2D finally parked the car.

"We here?" She asked, climbing into the driver's seat and sitting on 2D's lap.

"Yep, now listen, luv, they'll fix ya hair for ya." The singer patted the girl's head, then got out of the car.

Girly was not even the word to describe this place, this place was a total male-pride-killing organization. Everything in the salon was either pink or fluffy, even the receptionist's hair was pink!

"Boys..." Murdoc looked around the entire place, "Does anyone else feel loike they jus' went ba' through puberty?"

"'m scared o' girls again!" 2D flinched at anything that moved.

"May I help you?" The receptionist asked.

All three men turned, now resembling a deer in headlights. Noodle ran happily up to the desk.

"Hai!" She nodded, then pointed to her head, "Toochi-san says you fix."

The receptionist smiled at the girl, then looked back up at the men, "She yours?"

They all nodded slowly.

"Oh, hun, looks like you had a little trouble with the scissors...unless one of those blokes did this..." She looked back up at the three manly-deprived-men.

"Yeah...Noods here decide' to cut her 'air." 2D began to explain.

"Say no more, Becky, come fix this little one's hair." The receptionist called over to a red-head.

"Come with me, sweety." She said sweetly, holding her hand out for Noodle.

Noodle suddenly felt scared, and clung to 2D's leg, "No."

"What if he came with you?" Beck knelt so she was eye-to-eye with Noodle.

"Hai." She looked up at 2D.

2D blushed, then turned to Murdoc and Russel, "So...this is what it's like to have your man-hood killed."

* * *

"And, we're done!" Becky turned Noodle's chair around. The girl gasped in excitement. He hair was now up to her chin with many layers, she had a small curtain of bangs that covered only half of her forehead.

"Good! Good!" Noodle clapped.

"Oh, Noodle, ya loo' so cute." 2D smiled, then looked up at Becky, "Can I leave now?"

"Sure, but it'll take a little more than that to get your pride back."

It was on that day the boys vowed never to walk into a salon again, it took too much porn and cologne to at least get a fraction of their dignity back.


	8. Boy, Boy, Boy

There is nothing more frightening that seeing someone you don't know...Oh wait, there is something more frightening, it's called 'That Someone You Don't Know Is Walking With Your Ten-Year-Old Guitarist!'

Murdoc watched in pure horror as Noodle skipped to the gates of Kong with a strange person following her. The person looked to be about her age, but that wasn't even the worst part!

The person was a boy!

The bassist walked this horrible scene unfold from his spot just outside the gate (Russel hated him smoking near Noodle), then quickly ran toward the house.

"FACEACHE! LARDS! GE' OUT 'ERE, NOW!" Murdoc was half way across the yard when the two men appeared in the door way.

"Wha' the hell, Murdoc?" Russel folded his arms, ready to pound the answer out of him.

2D, who was awoken from a drug-induce nap, rubbed his eyes and leaned against door frame, "Yeah, Mudz, wha's 'rong?"

"LI'LE, PERSON, CHILD, UMM, NOODLE, YES, NOODLE, WIT' ANOTHE' PERSON, MALE, CHILD!" Murdoc yelled frantically, flailing his arms for emphasis.

2D and Russel stared at Murdoc, echanged glances with eachother, then looked back at the bassist.

Murdoc stared right back, then ran a hand over his face, "OUR LI'LE NOODLE IS WIT' A BOY!"

The other mens' eyes shot wide open.

"NUH HUH, NOT IN MY HOUSE!" Russel shouted, causing 2D and Murdoc to smirk a bit.

"Russ, ya bettah go block 'em fro' eachothe'." 2D commented.

"Yeah!' Murdoc agreed, wagging his finger, "'Cause-"

Just then, Noodle and her male friend opened the gates of Kong and began walking toward the front door.

"Hide!" Murdoc screamed/whispered.

"Not in my house!" Russel pushed as still giggling 2D into a near by bush. He then threw Murdoc under Geep, and proceeded to try to climb a tree.

"Weird..." Noodle commented as the approached the house, "Swear just see boys." She readjusted her helmet, and continued to lead this mysterious boy into the house.

The second the door closed, Russel fell from the tree and Murdoc climbed out from Geep. They both joined 2D in the bush.

"Mudz...is tha' a twig pokin' meh-"

"Yes."

"Men, this is no time to worry 'bout Mudz sexuality!"

"Righ', Noods is in the'e wiff some bloke 'ho wants ta get in 'er pants!" 2D exclaimed, folding his arms the best he could.

All eyes fell on the bluenette for quite some time. Finally, Russel spoke,

"Right, well, we can not allow this!"

"Wha' e'actly can we no' allow?" Murdoc questioned.

"I...I dunno...Maybe meh mom knows howta handle a sit-u-ation loike this." 2D replied thoughtfully.

Murdoc whipped out his phone and dialed in the number. The second the woman answered all three men screamed "NOODLE HAS A FRIEND!"

"Oh, well, goo' fer 'er." Rachel said slowly.

"You dun understan', mom, i's a boy!" 2D exclaimed.

"So?"

"Well...I dunno, shou'n't boys sti' be icky to 'er or somethink?"

"Well, she does live wiff three o' 'em." Rachel pointed out.

"Oh...yeah..."

"Stuart?"

"Yes?"

"Are you on any new meds I dun know 'bout?"

"Umm...I duno fink so..." 2D thought that over when the line went dead.

"Don't hurt yo'self, man." Russel said, climbing out of the bush. He helped the other two men up and they walked back inside.

When they entered, the sight before them cause Russel to pass out, Murdoc to flip a table, and 2D to scream out "HELL NO!"

Noodle was hugging this boy!

Turns out his name was Chris. He was a kid Noodle knew from the park. They were only friends...


	9. Fancy Dresses

_**A/N: Hm, it appears that prom is upon us once again. Am I going? No, for I am a mere freshmen. Why does from seem to annoy me so? For every dance I always have to help someone get ready,pay for stupid stuff, find a dress, do their hair and make up, fix a dress, or even make a dress. As you can see, I am very busy this month. Oh well! Lol, I enjoy it XD But I won't get much cosplay or typing in...Any how, this was written based off of my experience of prom dress hunting for my sister (she doesn't really care what she wears, but my mom was flipping out, and I guess I'm miss beauty consultant) SO, I invented this little chapter :D** **ENJOY!**_

Oh, award shows, the night were all the celebrities dressed up, cried over some meaningless award, get black-out drunk, and probably hear about their mistakes the next day. The Gorillaz were no exception.

"Mudz, you gotta wear a suit." Russel tried to reason with the bassists.

"I dun even wanna go, why shoul' I get dressed up jus' fer this?" Murdoc protested.

"'Cause last time we went to an award show, you were completely naked."

"I ha' a thong on."

"That is completely beside the- Oh Good Lord, Noodle is gonna need a dress!" Russel suddenly remembered. 2D, who had his headphones on, suddenly shreaked in fear.

"Does tha' mean we'll have ta go to tha' girly store in t'e mall!?"

"Um...yes...yes it does." Russel's face went blank of all emotions. Murdoc was preparing to run to the winnebago, but Russel grabbed the color of his shirt, still maintaining no emotion. Both 2D and Murdoc's faces were filled with horror. But, come on, how bad could it be?

* * *

The store was hot, stuffy, and filled with tule, rhinestones and people. Lots and Lots of people!

"You guys, doe' anyone else feel loike they jus' go' killed by a unicorn?" 2D's eye twitched a little.

"Look, all we gotta do is have Noodle pick out a dress she likes, disapprove of the price, then get the hell out of here!" Russel said, establishing the game plan. Both boys nodded, but a sudden seen had their eyes blown wide open.

Little Noodle came prancing out in a triangle top dress that was short than short and bright red. A Roxanne dress basically**_(1)._**

And that is how our heros wound up hiding under the skirt of a rather large dress.

* * *

"What do we do!? WHAT DO WE DO!?" Russel whispered/screamed.

"W'oes t'e broad wearin' this dress?" 2D looked around, realizing the skirt hid Murdoc, Russel, and himself quite nicely and still had room for probably two more.

"Faceache! Focus!" Murdoc slapped the back of the bluenette's head.

"Someone call Stu's mom!" Russel said in panic.

2D grabbed his phone and dialed in the number.

"What is it-"

"NOODLE NEEDS A DRESS!" The boys shouted out at once.

"Why didn't you call me to begin with?" Rachel asked, lifting the skirt of the dress.

"Mom! 'ow'd ya find us?"(**_2)_ **2D asked.

"Noodle called, we found a dress for her**_(3_**)." Rachel folded her arms.

"Do we still have to pay for it?" Russel questioned.

"Yes."

"How much?"

"$200."

"FOR A DRESS!?"

Russel was just about to protest when Noodle stepped out of the dressing room. She wore a pink dress with short sleeves and a poofy skirt. There was a satin ribbon that tied in a bow in the back.

"I look good?" She asked sweetly. If that didn't melt the boys' heart, nothing would.

"You look beautiful." Russel smiled.

"Gorgeous."

Murdoc growled a little, yes, he thought it looked good, but for two hundered dollars! Come on!

They bought it anyway, and the boys got some entertainment for the day.

As they were leaving the store, a women walked in and picked up the dress the boys were hiding in. They watched in pure as she tried on the dress...and it was too tight on her.

"Dude..." 2D's eyes went wide, "That's the broad wearing that dress!"

_**(1)= Exact description of the dress my mom had my sis tried on**_

_**(2)= I found my sis's dress and she wanted a darker color, so I went to look for one, meanwhile, my brother was getting a suit for his prom, and he met us at the store. Magically he found me in the mass of plastic and tule I was surrounded by**_

_**(3)= Like I said, I found my sister's dress.**_


	10. Skate For Your Life

Boredom: A word used a lot around KONG studios, but mostly by 2D or Murdoc. Today was different, though. Today it was Noodle who threw the word around.

"Bored!" She whined, attempting to crawl up 2D's leg the second he walked out of his room.

"Wan' ta watch a zombie movie?" 2D asked, putting his hand on the child's head so she couldn't climb up any further.

"No!" The girl squeaked, giving the front man a quick kick to the shin. Before he had time to yell at her, the guitarist was already half way down the hall, looking for her next victim.

* * *

Not even an hour later, and 2D had at least two more bruises, Murdoc had syrup in his hair, and Russel now had marks on his arms from where Noodle was clinging to.

"Guys, Noods is ou' o' control!" 2D exclaimed, downing about three migraine pills.

"She kee's sayin' shes bored!" Murdoc smacked the back of 2D's head.

"Well, maybe we should do something with her, she's always cooped up in the house."

"Well, wha' a'e we goin' ta do wiff her?" 2D asked, leaning against one of the kitchen chairs.

"We cou-"

"TOOCHI-SAN! MURDOC-SAN! RUSSEl-SAN! COME PLAY HOUSE!"

And as our brave heros fled to their new hiding places like the pansies they are, an idea struck them all.

Rachel didn't even have time to say hello, the boys had already began their usually screaming.

"Stuart, why dun ya take 'er ta the roller rink? Ya use' ta love roller bladin', 'member, ya and yer friends use' ta go all the time, you loo'd loike a lil-"

"Mum, NO!"

"-angel ou' there on the rink."

"Okay, goo' bye, mum, goo' bye!" 2D said, quickly hanging up the phone and putting his head in his hands.

"A' angel, ay?"

"SHU' UP!"

* * *

The roller rink was your typical rink, one that still looked like it was from the seventies despite all then teenagers hanging out there. The funny thing is, people actually recognized 2D as Stuart, a lot of them being old friends who couldn't find a job elsewhere.

"Pot, haven't seen you in forever." A brown-haired man walked over to the singer.

"Jude, 'ow longs it been?"

"Too long, so, you here with the band?"

"Yup."

"Awesome," Jude looked at the mismatched bunch, "Blades or skates?"

"Blades, duh." 2D folded his arms and pretended to look mad.

"What about the big guy?" Jude looked passed him, Russel looked up.

"Skates."

"That dude?" Jude nodded toward Murdoc.

"I dun skate." Murdoc stated, well, until he saw a hot blonde roll on by, "Skates..."

"Toochi-san, Toochi-san!" Noodle ran over to the blunette and hugged his leg as groups of children ran past them.

"What about the little one?" The singer's friend bent over in order to be at eye level with her.

"Skates." 2D picked the child up.

"Thought so."

Now, mind you, it had been years since 2D last bladed, so it made sense that everyone kept teasing that he was going to fall on his stupid face. But, then again, when does anything for the Gorillaz make sense?

After everyone had their roller skates (or blades) on, they made their way (slowly) to the rink. 2D was the first to get on and began skating circles around his band mates.

So Rachel was right, 2D was pretty good at skating. He stumbled once or twice in the beginning, but after that, continued flawlessly. Russel inched against the wall, having not skated since he was Noodle's age, and Murdoc just leaned against the wall, waiting for some attractive woman to skate by.

This experience was totally new to Noodle. She had never done this before and couldn't get the movement down. Every time she let go of the wall, she would begin stumbling uncontrollably and fall down. On a positive note, the girl was doing way better than Russel.

After a few minutes of stumbling and falling, Noodle gave up and sat on the floor.

"Noods, wha's wrong?" 2D bladed next to her and sat beside her.

"I no skate." Noodle was trying to get her skates off, but Russel had tied them tight.

2D said nothing and stood up. He held out a hand for Noodle to take and helped her up.

"Toochi-san? We go now?" Noodle asked.

"Nope." 2D began to drag her away from the wall.

"Toochi-san, no!" Noodle cried as the wall got further and further away.

"Noods, yer doin' it!" 2D smiled brightly. Noodle gasped in excitement as she skated next to her best friend. A couple more stumbles later and she had the hang of it and could let go of 2D's hand.

The child was having so much fun, she hardly noticed the others leave the rink until the DJ made an announcement.

"Couple Skating only now, grab your other half or take a break."

Noodle fell down again and tried getting off of the rink, she knew what a couple was and she knew what only meant. The girl frowned and tried getting off the rink when a hand rested on her shoulder.

"Who?" The girl turned around quickly, only to fall down again. 2D smirked a bit and helped her up.

"It's couple skatin', luv, if ya wanna keep skatin', I coul' go wiff ya." He offered.

"Toochi-san be Noodle's boyf'iend?"

"Um...I guess tha's wha' a couple i', so yeah, fer tonight." 2D smiled yet again and took the girl's hand.

The two skated for the next two hours, the horrible regretted that for the next two days. Skating can really do a number on your ankles!

_**A/N: I loooooooooooooove skating even though it hurts my ankles. I wrote this at my cousin's skating party. 2D is based around me, my two cousins, and my sis who are amazing at blading. Russel is based after my dad, he was on skates and had to inch along the wall with my stepma cause they couldn't figure it out XD there was a little girl who was better than them. Noodle is based off of my little sis and all the other little ones that my cousin and I had to help skate. Over all, it was fun, until the next day when I was in gym class and noticed a huge bruise on my ankle XD oh man, we were even dancing on blades, it was crazy.**_


	11. Are You Chicken?

Chicken Pox: That childhood illness that you must experience at some point in your life because it's just that much fun. And, since Noodle was a mere child, it made sence that she would experience the illness.

It all started with a small cough one night during rehearsal.

"Noodle, ya don' sing ye'." Murdoc slowed his bass playing, but still didn't miss a chord.

"No sing, cough." Noodle did her best to explain with broken english.

"Well, keep i' down, we got ta finish this song." Murdoc growled.

Noodle tried to stifled her coughs in her sleeve, which made it incredibly hard to play. After about two minutes of the craziest sounds ever, 2D stopped singing.

"Luv, ya nee' wat'r o somethink?" The man asked. The little girl shook her head.

"Are you feelin' alright?" Russel asked.

"Hai!" Noodle exclaimed and began playing her guitar again, only to start coughing again. The rest of the band watched at the girl's feeble attempts to play until Russel called the rehearsal short and carried Noodle to bed.

Little did anyone know, this was more than just a small cough.

* * *

The next day, Noodle woke up aching all over. She began sitting up when another feeling hit her. An itchy sensation actually. Noodle rubbed her eyes and gasped in shock. He hands were covered in tiny bumps. Panicking, the child threw her blankets off of her, only to notice the same bumps covering her legs too.

"RUSSEl-SAN! TOOCHI-SAN, MURDOC! COME!" She shouted, running to her bedroom door and throwing it open. Her boys were in her door way in two seconds, then away from the door way in half a second, then spraying disinfectant spray everywhere in a millisecond.

Noodle watched the boys run around the room in plastic gloves and masks, spraying disinfectant sprays, lighting matches, and praying for some reason.

"What go on?" Noodle asked, scratching at the little bumps.

"NOODLE! DON'T SCRATCH THOSE!" Russel dropped the can he was holding and ran up to the girl, putting oven mitts on her hands.

"What for?" Noodle held her arms up.

"You have chicken pox, baby girl." Russel answered plainly.

"Chicken?" Noodle questioned. She knew what chickens were, and these little spots looked nothing like them. Perhaps the illness came from a chicken, "Chicken make Noodle sick?"

"No, Noods, they' jus' calle' tha' 'cause...well...I dunno, actually." 2D stopped disinfecting the door knob and thought that one over.

"Yeah, why are they called chicken pox?" Murdoc questioned, looking up as well.

"Hm...Maybe 'cause." Russel was cut off by a sudden sneeze from Noodle. That sent the men running for the showers like a bunch of football players.

* * *

"So, does anyone remember getting chicken pox before?" Russel asked as he scrubbed his arms until they burned.

"I do." 2D replied, rinsing his hair out.

"I've seen your medical records, 'D, you never had chicken pox." Murdoc commented, doing his best to burn away any germs.

"Oh...Well what's this spot then?" 2D held up his arm to reveal three tiny red spots.

* * *

Now three miles away from Kong studio, lying on the room of Murdoc's Winnebago, Russel and the bassist stared up at the clouds.

"It just ain't the same without 'D." Russel sighed, watching the clouds glide by.

"Yeah, well, what do we do about those two?"

"We should call 'D's mom, she is a nurse after all." Russel pointed out.

"Oh yeah!" Murdoc sat up as Russel called the woman.

* * *

Calamine lotion, aka, the lotion of the gods!

"That's all?" Russel and Murdoc crowded around the cell phone.

"Yup, ma'e sure they dun scratch, oatmeal baths 'elp, too." Rachel said cheerfully.

"Okay, great, thanks." Russel hung up, only to be met by Murdoc looking completely irritated.

"What?"

"I can't afford oatmeal!"

* * *

Back at Kong Studio, after realizing you can only get chicken pox once, Every was in Noodle's room, Murdoc sat in a swivel chair, Russel laid on the floor, and 2D and Noodle were curled up on the child's bed.

"It just ain't the same with Noodle in here."

_**A/N: Sorry, Noods, Boys only in the "Boys only who over react when they're young lady has a problem club". XD oh boy, anyway, thanks for reading!**_


	12. We Got This In The Bag

Usually, when a boy saw another boy wearing the same shirt, they were either instant bros or didn't even care. Now when girls saw another female in the same outfit, things usually got real ugly real fast.

Is this true, though? Of course not. But the boys believed this little law anyway, having seen at least one fight one time break out once at a bar they were all at. Both girls had the same jackets on...then again they both belonged to their cheating boyfriend, but still, they were probably fighting because of the same jacket thing!

2D actually walked out of that bar with a bruise because of it! Then again, he did try to pull Murdoc away from the girls...

So anyway, that scarring event made the boys believe that every girl fought when they wore the same outfit.

Even girls like Noodle.

It wasn't common for the Gorillaz to go to the store, but they were running dangerously low on beer and cigarettes and Noodle wanted pocky, so off to the store it was.

It was pretty cold out that day, and Noodle had left her jacket at home**_(1)._**2D gladly gave his hoodie to the child, he was already wearing his T Virus shirt, so he wasn't too cold.

The hoodie was an old one from when 2D was in highschool. He got it once to wear at a few football games and kept it around.

It's not like it was a unique hoodie or anything, heck, the chick in the cereal aisle was wearing the same- oh crap.

2D stopped dead in his tracks when he saw the girl.

"Hey, 'D, ain't that yer old highschool girlfriend?" Russel looked at the woman, the froze up too, his eyes going from the girl and to Noodle.

"Hey, ain't tha' Marcy." Murdoc asked, then his eyes widened as well.

"We gotta hide the kid!" The bassist hissed suddenly, looking for something for the girl to hide in.

"No we're hidin' Noods? It's jus' 'asn't been the same since the chicken pox thin'." 2D pouted.

"SHUT IT, FACEACHE, SHE'LL HEAR YOU!" Murdoc exclaimed a little too loudly.

"Stuart?" Marcy turned, a huge smile on her face.

"Uh, um, hiya Marc, wha's up?" 2D smiled sheepishly as Russel fled the scene, returning shortly after with a paper bag.

Noodle was hidden behind 2D's back, she looked around curiously. Who the heck was this woman, and why were the boys so scared of her?

"How've ya been?" The woman asked.

"Eh, good, mos'ly." 2D answered, then turned slightly when he heard the sound of tearing. Noodle waddled over to his side, now wearing a paper bag over her hoodie.

"Awh, who's this little gal?" Marcy knelt down so she could get a better look at the girl.

"This is my little luv, Noodle." 2D knelt too and put a hand on Noodle's shoulder. Marcy smiled, "Why are you wearing a bag, sweety?"

"Dunno, Russ Murdoc put on me, no like hoodie, think." Noodle did her best to explain when she noticed something, "You, I wear same hoodie!" She clapped her hands and took the bag off. Marcy gasped a little, then laughed, "You got Stu's jacket on, don't you?"

"Hai!"

"Whoa, we're like hoodie bffs now, aren't we?"

"Hai!"

"Awesome!" Marcy highfived Noodle, The straitened up, "Well, it was nice seeing ya, Stuart, we should meet up again some time." She handed the boy her number and walked away.

2D blushed a deep red as Russel quickly called Rachel.

"No, not all women fight when they're wearing the same outfit."

_**(1)= I am always forgetting my jacket at my mom's house. Lucky for me, my bro lives with my dad, and he always let's me borrow his prized hoodie. He's a firefighter/EMT and for a holiday, his entire team got hoodies, so yeah, I'm proud to wear it!**_


	13. In Sickness and In Hell

Appendicitis was a common thing that always ended in surgery. Surgery usually began with a patient who had never had surgery before. A patient usually started as a child. WHY DID THE PATIENT HAVE TO BE NOODLE!?

It all started with a small tummy ache, but of course, this is Gorillaz, nothing that small ever wound up being that simple!

"Russel-san..." Noodle approached the large man, who was busy looking for one of his drumsticks. When he heard the small voice, he put his search on hold.

"What's up, babygirl?"

"Hurt." Noodle reached her arms up so he could pick her up.

"You're hurt?"

"Hai!"

This was a completely random thought, but Russel seriously hoped she scraped her knee or something like that and wasn't hurt in the way he was thinking.

"Where you hurt at?" Russel just had to ask that deadly question.

"Here." Noodle pointed to her middle. The drummer cringed but quickly realized where she was pointing.

"Oh, you have a stomach ache?"

"Hai!"

"Oh, well are you hungry?"

"No, Mur'oc make Noodle big samich." The girl held out her arms to show just how big the sandwhich was.

"Oh, well you probably just ate too much or something, maybe 2D has something to make you feel better." The man suggested, carrying the child to the singer's room.

* * *

"I ain't a pharmacy, Russ." 2D began sifting through his box of pills.

"Yeah, well you're close enough." Russel folded his arms. 2D glared and tossed a bottle of low dose asprins to the drummer.

"Gi'e 'er two every fou' 'ours an' if she in't betteh by tomorrow, call me ba'."

"Thanks, 'D." Russel gave the pills to the child.

"Anythin' for Noods."

* * *

The next day was much worse than the first. Noodle woke up and threw up all over her bed. By the time Russel got to her room, she was as pale as a ghost.

"Sweet Satan, wha's all th-OH MY GOD THAT I DON'T BELIEVE IN!" Murdoc exclaimed, quickly getting over his hangover when he saw the girl.

"Wha's goin' on," 2D saw the vomit and the pale girl in front of him, "I seen t'is before, 'he's possessed, we mus' perfo'm an exercisim before she eats Murdoc."

Everyone stared at 2D, well, except for Noodle, who was busy throwing up again.

"Wait, 'D, isn't yer mum a nurse?" Murdoc quickly remembered.

"Yes, why?"

"CALL HER!" Russel exclaimed, taking Noodle into his arms. 2D jumped and fumbled for his phone. He punched in the number and waited intensely.

"Hello?"

"MUM, NOODLE IS POSSESED!"

"Damn it, Faceache!"

"Ow, tha' 'urt!"

"It was supposed ta!"

Among the arguing, Russel managed to get a hold of 2D's phone.

"Hey, Rach."

"Oh hi, Russel, what' can I do fer ya boys?"

"It seems Noodle is sick."

"Sick?"

"Yeah, she had a stomach ache yesterday and now she's warm and throwing up."

There was a pause, and much to everyone's surprize, 2D grabbed the phone back.

"OR I'S 'ER APPENDIX!"

"Yes! Stuart is pro'ly right, you should take 'er ta the hospital." Rachel said.

"Wait, 2D is right?" Russel was dumbfounded.

"I know, I know, bu' if 'e is, the situation could be quite serious."

"Oh great, thanks, Rach." Russel hung up the phone, wrapped Noodle in a blanket and headed out to geep with Murdoc and 2D close behind.

* * *

"Does it hurt here?" The doctor asked, poking Noodle's side for the fifth time.

"Hai!" The girl was practically in tears from the pain, she buried her face in Russel's arms, hoping the pain would go away.

"I see, I see, now, does-"

"DAMN IT, MAN, SHE'S IN PAIN!" Russel finally shouted out.

"Mr. Hobbs, who is the doctor here?" The doctor folded his arms.

"Mr. Docotor, 'ho's about ta ge' Judo kicked _**(1)**_ in the arse?" 2D commented to Murdoc, who actually smirked a bit.

"Nice one, Faceache."

The comment made Noodle giggle a little, but the giggle was soon replaced with a groan.

"Yup, it's defiantly her appendix." The doctor finally stated.

"No duh." Russel growled. The doctor shot him a dirty look.

"She'll need surgery."

When this comment was made, all three froze up instantly. Noodle looked quite frightened now.

"Soo-ger-ey?" She said slowly, making sure she heard that right.

"Yes."

"Hai?" Noodle gave the doctor a curious look.

"Yup, it's where we knock you out, cut you open with a knife, and-"

Noodle began panicking, "Cut!? Knife!?" She leapt from Russel's arms and tried to run, but the pain along with her blue haired friend stopped her.

"Noods, i's gonna be okay." 2D rubbed her back a little and pulled her into a hug.

"No soo-ger-ey!" Noodle cried into his shoulder.

"Bu' it'll ma'e ya feel betteh."

"Cut hurt though."

"No i' won'. They put you ta sleep, luv."

"Like they do cats?"

"No, luv, not loike tha' a' all, and whe' i's oveh, you'll 'ave a real cool scar." 2D grinned, revealing the gap in his smile.

"Scars like you?" Noodle pointed to a few exposed scars on 2D's arms.

"Kinda." 2D really had no answer for her, but she seemed alright with it. Half an hour later, Noodle was all ready for surgery. When she began to be wheeled away from her boys, she became nervous all over again.

"No go!" She called out to the boys.

"We'll be right here, Noodle." Russel promised her. This didn't settle her one bit, until...

"Rachel?" Noodle looked over at one of the nurses in the operating room.

"Hello, Miss Noodle." Rachel patted the girl's head.

"Rachel, what w'ong wiff me?"

"You have appendicitis."

"Hai?"

"You're appendix isn't good anymore, but we'll fix you, okay?"

"Hai!"

"Great."

The next moment, Noodle didn't remember at all, the doctor told her to close her eyes and count backwards from one hundred. She only got to ninety-nine (she couldn't count well in the first place) and the next moment, she opened her eyes. She was in a hospital room surrounded by her boys.

"It over?"

"Yup, ya di' great, luv." 2D smiled and ruffled her hair.

"See, that wasn't so bad." Russel rubbed the girl's tiny hand.

"Russ...this bill is gonna be enormous." Murdoc reminded the drummer.

"Yup...I know..."

2D sighed and stared at the ceiling.

"Ya know, we di'n't 'ide anywhere this time."

"Oh yeah, we didn't..." Murdoc remembered.

"Wanna go hide in a broom closet or something?" Russel suggested.

And with that, all three men hid in the nearest broom closet, just trying to get back in to the swing of things.

They survived this mess, what else could they take on?

_**(1)= my teacher is a brown belt, so the one day a student was misbehaving and we were like "Senorita, you should Judo kick him in the throat!" XD good times from spanish class.**_


	14. I am a woman, period! Part One

_**A/N: Alright, peeps, the chapter ya'll have been waiting for, DUN, DUN, DUNNNNNNNNNNNNN Part 1 of 4**_

* * *

Noodle woke up one morning to a horrible pain in her tummy.

"What could this be?" The girl sat up, realizing there was a cramp in her back too. Noodle grimaced and stood slowly. There was a sudden gush of something was and Noodle's face lit up with embarrassment.

"Oh no, did I really just do that!?" The girl mumbled as she ran off to the bathroom. But when Noodle realized what actually happened, the embarrassment turned to pure panic.

* * *

"Go' a'y eights?" 2D asked, dealing the cards again.

"I though' we were playin' old maid!" Murdoc exclaimed.

"Guys, we're playing black jack!" Russel threw his cards down. He looked up just in time to see Noodle enter the kitchen.

"Hey, baby girl, what's wrong?" The drummer noticed the expression on the girl's face. Noodle took a deep breath before answering.

"Russel-san...I start my first period." Noddle said the words slowly.

And just like that, the boys, the cards, and six bottles of alcohol up and disappeared.

* * *

No safely crammed in the vent system of Kong, the 'men' of the house continued to panic.

"Faceache, call yer mum!" Murdoc nearly shouted.

"No, we dun need 'er this time, we go' this!" 2D replied, knowing damn well he had no idea what to do.

"Just call her!" Russel argued.

"Al'ight, al'ight." 2D pulled out his phone and typed the number in slowly.

"Hello?"

"Hi, um, mum...Nood's kin'a, ummm..."

"Started her period?"

"Yes!" all three boys shouted at once.

"OOH! How wonderfu!"

"Well, um...wha' do we do?" 2D asked calmly.

"Well, she'll need pads."

"What are those?" Little did Stu Pot know, he would be getting his answer soon enough.


End file.
